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Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Military Boy...Part 2


So I have this fantasy. And not like a sexual fantasy....and not even like my normal fantasy where a bunch of firemen come to a roof deck in Brazil to show me their hoses. Seriously, their hoses, I mean you just can’t even believe how strong the water flow is on those damn things.


But I digress:

So I have been having a fantasy about Military Boy...a “daydream” if you "intellectuals" will.


It goes something like this.

Military Boy gets hurt in Iraq…but not like hurt-hurt, just something small, just something small enough where they have to send him back home. Maybe like gets a pinkie finger blown off or something, something that doesn’t really matter. Or gets appendicitis …yes! That’s it! Needs an appendectomy…or maybe a really bad bladder infection (can dudes get those?).


So he gets this “small injury” and they need to send him home…but not just home, to a hospital…and not to just any hospital...but whatever medical procedure they need to do to him can only be done by the hospital that is a block away from my apartment. Because the only real appendectomies place happens to be across the street. And his family, well his poor family, is out there living in the South, probably miles away from running water and cannot fly to come see him…..

Who is the bitch in the white dress trying to steal my thunder?


So guess who he has to call? …No no, not the girls from Scores... no, he has to call ME ..And I walk into the hospital room, and he is laying there and looks up, and I am like a vision, probably wearing my purple dress with the V-Neck that caused me to max out my Banana Republic card, and it breezes around as I walk in the room, because there is always a light breeze from somewhere.

I spend the whole week with him, caring for him and I bring gifts and fruit and laptops and puppies....And by the time his parents finally arrive at the hospital, I am laying there on the hospital couch, asleep... Exhausted from all the “caring”.


And his parents look over at me and then look at Military Boy and say, “wow, she must be one amazing woman to stay here with you all this time.” And he bows his head and says, “She is Mom…she really is…”

End Scene.

Soooo, I know what you’re thinking…this could really happen…right?

14 Cizz-omments:

Anonymous said...

oh yes..this culd TOTALLY happen!...and so could a bunch of firemen from brazil showing up with hoses!

Sid said...

You like him.
Weird my fantasy is so similar to yours. Except the guy gets hurt in a car accident that doesn't leave any scars or make him ugly in any way. And I have to entertain him ... and it's so never going to happen.

Potsie said...

I'm sure in real life he wouldn't be happy about losing any finger, or coming home because he needs to have his appendix looked at.

Think about it...you are wishing for his misfortune. How will you two pinky-swear?

Kim & Dic said...

@NYer- hey now this could happen, I read THE SECRET!

@SID-...I know :( yes...a non-ugly -non-scar kinda hurt....and you take care of him in the hospital as well??

@joc- well he could LIVE a normal life without a pinky, ya know? i just mean he needs to get hurt but in a non-bad way, thats all...common joc, dont you ever want to endanger some girl you care about????

Heather said...

I have fantasies like this fairly often, except in mine somehow I'm the one laid up with the bladder infection/appendicitis.

I think I like yours better.

Liöüx said...

Oh. I thought in a perverse way he was CALLING you mom, [instead of addressing his actual mom] when he said:

"She IS [a] Mom...She really is..."

Lots of men have 'mommy' issues.

Just sayin'.

So@24 said...

What a dream boat.

Kim & Dic said...

@heather- maybe we should be concerned we have "fantasies" like this? maybe hospital ones are not the best kind..

@liox- hmm that would be strange, but no, he is refering to his actual mom, at least in my daydream he is...

No Longer Active said...

It's all about the light breeze coming from somewhere...that's like the heart stopping/love at first sight moment...

Anonymous said...

Just so military boy doesn't have to get hurt...may I suggest the following alternate scenario... he has to come to your neighborhood to do some covert mission, and he needs a Bond Girl. Enter YOU. So you help him out of a few scrapes with Sinister Folk, wow him with your knowledge of the city's underground tunnels, weasle important information out of unsuspecting foreign nationals using nothing but your wiles and your purple dress...he might even have to wipe away some face smudges (gunpowder, grease from hotwiring car, blood from animal whose life you saved along way, etc.) but he will do so tenderly. And he could do so with his pinky, if he so desired, because he would still have it.

Kim & Dic said...

@dcd- YES it is, somehow the breeze makes them fall in love!

@anon- OH LORDY YOU ARE GIVING ME WAY TOO MANY GOOD IDEAS! i have a wild imagination so this kinda stuff def gets me thinking..

Anonymous said...

I've been privy to those same fantasies...

BUT, I hasten to add, not with YOUR MAN ;-)

Frankly, Scarlett said...

Ok, listen to me, honey: Put the Saving Private Ryan, Pearl Harbor, English Patient movies down, and back away slllooowwwlllyyy.

Kim & Dic said...

common scarlet...indulge with me...i know you want to...