This morning while getting dressed, fixing my hair, taming the lion in my bed, I caught a glimpse of the Today Show on NBC. Now I know what you’re thinking ‘ it’s because Matt Lauer wears those hot high waisted dad-jeans, but alas no, I already have that as my screen saver so no need to worry….
Matt's jeans flatter his body to no end, I look at this picture and think 'damn'
I was horrified to find a woman on the program named Laura Ingraham speaking about how we are a porn-tastic country where the media and news replay shots of people like Britney Spears writhing around in her underwear simply because sex sells. She went on to mention something about us all taking action and stopping the overt sexuality that is all over TV…make our young children put on clothes…feed the homeless blah blah blah.
What kind of malarkey was this woman saying? Cover up? Our bodies? With clothes? Lady listen to me, they don’t call us Amer-I-Ca-take-your-clothes-off for nothing, ok? Clearly being that she was born during the era of dinosaurs I could see how women showing some ankle maybe even a calf could be disturbing for this lady. I mean she was wearing some shiteous pink or floral or ancient smock, probably made by the ancient Greeks, I don’t know. The point is, stop trying to take naked-ness away from me! If women like Britney didn’t show up naked how else would I feel good about myself? Self-Esteem, Shmaelf-Esteem…I want to be naked, hell I can barely keep my clothes on at the gym as is, the fitness manager has to tap me on the shoulder sometimes and let me know that naked squats over the ballet bar are not appropriate at Jesus-Gyms-R-US.
Laura has her own fashion line, I believe it is sold in a fancy store called 'Muslim Chic'
Miss Ingraham needs to jump off her conservative horse for a moment and consider this, how the hell am I supposed to find a husband if I don’t walk around with my ya-ya-sisterhood hanging out all day? You tell me that Laura! ...with dignity and class? PUH-LEASE