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Friday, April 11, 2008

Friday's Deep Thoughts

So I figured on this warm, sunny Friday I would do a special post that is near and dear to my heart...called Things I Hate. I tried to think of a more creative title for that but 'When Snow White Feeds Animals and is Happy Living with Seven Sober Men' didn't fit in the title as well.


So now let us begin:
THINGS I HATE
#1
Nature

I am not oh-so-fond of the whole 'living things' surrounding me. Things that suck
up all my air and steal my water. I am not a fan of the whole "Birds" and "trees"
and things "that are beautiful and green". I enjoy nature right where it should be... in fake soil at the mall's atrium.



#2
CHILDREN

Now I agree with what you are thinking, which is, Kim,this is quite an obvious one! I mean listen, sometimes I just don't need their happy smiling faces on people under the age of 21 trying to "change the world" and other bullshit like that. I prefer my children to be in a gated mall atrium as well.

#3

COUPLES

Somewhere in the bible Jesus is quoted as saying something along the lines of , "People in love will be killed by a thunderbolt!" Now you can go ahead and try and correct me if you think I am wrong, but listen , Jesus and I are tight, and I know that even if he didn't get that quote mentioned in there, I know he was thinking it.

#4

The scene in the Lion King when they sing Circle of Life and present the baby

Now I don't know about you, but this does not make me cry, this doesn't even give me tingles all over my entire body (especially my knees) ...and not only that but it doesn't even give me tingles and make my eyes well up with hot tears when I am staring at simply this picture right now. Damn you LION KING! DAMN YOU!

#5

ahh....Did I mention Children?


#6
BACKYARDS



Want to know what I want to see when I look out my back window? Asphalt. Lots and lots of asphalt. And possibly a homeless person sleeping on it, or some chalk outline bodies...or maybe even trash, how about some good ol' trash? When I look out my window and I see cement and a person frozen to concrete.... I know I am home.





11 Cizz-omments:

Jocular Schlemiel said...

I'm with you in regards to children. I'm a big fan of the Lion King though. BIG FAN.

You should add these to the list:

Speedos
Ashton Kutcher
Trucker Hats
Ashton Kutcher wearing trucker hats
Poorly assembled sandwiches
Celery in tuna fish
and
People's misuse of turning signals

Give 'Em Hell Harry said...

I think the young man in #5 looks like a bavarian pimp showing off his bitches. Just sayin'.

modelbehavior said...

I hate that scene in Snow White too! Actually, I just hate Snow White. Brave of you to Bitch out Lion King too.

NYer said...

I am so with Joc regarding the speedos!! esp old men and speedos!!

MsPuddin said...

yeah why you hatin on the Lion King though...*tear* I used to hold my brother up when he was a baby, to that scene...cuz I'm a G

Kids + mspuddin = medication and random acts of violence...

Frankly, Scarlett said...

Heheh - love it! Was that supposed to be the most touching scene in the movie or something?? I haven't seen the Lion Kin since probably 1995. So I don't remember.

Kat said...

i hate to say it but lion king does make me tear up a bit

just me said...

That scene always makes me feel like a damn crying baby too.

Damn you, Lion King.

Lioux said...

My list is pretty similar, NYCP Chick.

Except I would include my hatred for children on my list.

Just sayin'.

BNY said...

You're tight with Jesus?

That's great because I kinda need a favor.

ZenDenizen said...

OMG how could you hate on Lion King!!!